An online children’s educational site called Dream English re-did the classic Alphabet Song to clarify what it called the confusing “LMNOP” part, as though there are generations of adults walking around thinking “LMNOP” is all one word. The new version is not only unnecessary from a phonic standpoint, it’s also unnecessary from a sonic standpoint: it completely alters not only the melody of the song but the rhythm, turning it into a lurching dirge that leaves you wondering W T F